So, I just stumbledupon this article and I have to say that I find myself contemplative. It isn’t usual that an article on abortion makes me think this hard since I really am staunchly in the pro for a womans right to choose. The mother is the ultimate decision maker in a pregnancy as she has to carry and deliver the child and have her life forever changed in the most immense way possible. I’ve known a few women who have wrestled with this impossible choice and ultimately it is not something that is ever taken lightly. The decision to abort will forever change a woman just as much as the decision to have the child and care for it, or to give the child up for adoption.
The article in ELLE makes note of the other side of the decision, what about the father? We’ve all been told many times over that it takes two to tango and obviously it takes two to conceive a child. For the most part- the debate on abortion really has centered on the mothers rights and as the article points out this was for a very good reason. At the start of this debate, women facing an unwanted pregnancy had next to no ability to decide how to proceed without risking their own lives and that is entirely unacceptable. In this more enlightened day and age it does beg the question or whether there are some imbalances to address.
There are of course dubious men and women seeking to use a pregnancy for dubious ends and when these things occur it does disgust me. Anything that would limit a womans rights would end up being exploited by one side or the other, just as women are not so innocent that there aren’t some who would intentionally get pregnant to “rope a big spender”. These would be the people who make the news, but what about the everyday, normal people who have this tough decision to make?
Every day there is an unplanned pregnancy and a woman who is scarred to death and man who sees their world closing in on them, just as there is a woman who is jumping for joy and a man looking at her with the most intense love in his eyes. So I ask- is there a middle ground that can be reached? If a woman is not ready to be a mother and the father has vehemently declared a desire to be a single father with no expectation of monetary compensation or involvement from the mother after the child’s birth, should she be compelled to comply with his wishes? alternately, if a woman wants to have the child, but the father had previously made clear that he did not desire children and that he would want to terminate an unexpected pregnancy, should he have any monetary obligation after the child’s birth (or during for that matter?)?
Either way- I have no intension of taking a stand on this because I am not a mother, I have never been pregnant, and this is a decision I pray that I will never have to make, but I do think it is a question worth asking.